THE WASHINGTON BULLETS, SIGH

Do any of you still have any Washington Bullets memorabilia? Now there was a basketball team a city could get behind. Do you know how many young men looked up to that team, said “Hey, I can believe in an ideology like this. I can do this”? Ten of thousands, perhaps. The whole city chipped in until Washington D. C. could proudly claim the murder capital of the United States. And when you consider that its population pales compared with those of Los Angeles (what’d you expect from a town with such pathetic killing names as Angels, Dodgers, or Lakers) or New York (Yankees, Mets, Jets, Giants, Knicks?). No, Washington had something to be proud of, the Bullets and the folks who stood behind the guns.

Face it, they renamed the “Bullets” the “Wizards”; the youth no longer believe that their town supports their murdering sensibilities. But do they then become acolytes of Hogwarts Academy? A bevy of Harry Potters, so to speak? No, without the support of their town, they seem to have given up any desire to succeed and have joined the ranks of the Republicans, the real evil in that town. Magic Wands don’t kill people, Bullets do.

I know many of old timers will want to bring up the Houston Colt .45s, that short-lived appellation of the now Houston Astros. Three years was simply not long enough for the town to get shootin’, and Texans love to shoot. Alas, Houston figured space was more admirable than killing, but that is so short sighted. Eventually, we will realize our movements into space will only serve to let the Aliens know where we are (so they can come at kill us with their laser beam weapons).

Here’s to the Washington Bullets, alas, yet another innocent victim of the war on crime.